In the Christian walk we understand grace to be the cornerstone of what we call the gospel. However, it falls into the realm of spiritual mystery- something unseen; felt, but intangible.

And this is how God moves most of the time: in quiet unseen ways, we often see the answers to prayer and his workings later than we believe we need. And I have made peace with this, as my life is a living testimony to him working for me despite myself.

However, a while back, in a distinct period of darkness, I found myself uttering the phrase “tangible Grace” in my prayers. “Lord, please give me something today to cling to, just a whisper to know you are there.”

These aren’t mountain moving prayers, but the equivalent of asking for a hug when we need one. And he answered- some days it was more obvious than others, but when I pray this prayer he shows up. I could give several examples, but one that got my attention last year was when my boy prayed for me. I had a time bound project I was stressed about and when Corbin prayed for me – I miraculously had two full uninterrupted hours to work that morning.

This year has been hard – harder than I anticipated and I have found myself begging for tangible Grace, not daily, but hour by hour- calling out for him to answer.

And it’s not about him moving mountains, but (maybe you’ve felt this) I need to know he’s still there. When things are bleak, the strongest faith can waiver and it’s hard to cling to your testimony when it feels like everything is wrong. And if I’m being honest, it’s been lonely. Not because I don’t have people who care, but no one wants to be the friend that cries on the daily for months.

And then the light breaks through.

I was given a gift with my office mates at my school. One of those gifts is our grade level counselor. She is smart, wildly funny, compassionate, and very good at her job. While our background and upbringing could not be further apart, we have a remarkable similar sense of humor and I found unexpected comradery with her. She and I have giggled about Daria, Keeping Up Appearances, and keep anecdotes for the book she plans on writing about the middle school escapades.

In a reflective conversation, she made a request in how we communicated. In her explanation she used the phrase, ” …because I know you, and I understand why you are who you are…”

In that moment I paused, because she does. It was not just words. I have felt isolated and untethered, and in that moment I felt ….seen.

Later that day, in a conversation with my boss (who I adore) we were discussing my role at the school, and she said, “because I know you, and I know how loyal you are and….”

And while she was conveying to me, “I see you,” what I heard in my spirit was God saying, “I SEE YOU.”

Tangible Grace.

We often gloss over how present God can be in the mundane – from telling Elijah to eat and sleep when he wanted to die (1 Kings 19) to offering kindness to Thomas’s doubt and showing up to meet him inthemidstofit (John 20).

I’m still in the weeds, but I know God is with me. I also know that gratitude cultivates peace, and faith. And that is why I am determined to not only praise him for his goodness, but recognize it as a testimony to share for others who may be struggling.

Ask for it: tangible Grace. You might be surprised how your Father shows up to give you a hug.